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The Brunswickan

Canada's Oldest Official Student Publication

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The Brunswickan

Canada's Oldest Official Student Publication

  • ArtsCultureSatire

Looking forward to summer

Crystal Keyamo The snow’s taking forever to peace out, like that one friend who won’t leave the party. Campus looks less like the North Pole now— maybe I’ll actually make it to class on time. No more Olympic-level skating down…

Read MoreLooking forward to summer
  • Crystal Keyamo
  • March 2, 2025
  • ArtsSatire

Observations from the Great Canadian Freeze: A Mugwump’s Satirical Take on Social Woes

By Crystal Keyamo As a self-proclaimed Mugwump, I find myself perched upon the icy plains of Canadian social discontent, observing with a mix of bemusement and bewilderment. From the cozy confines of my igloo, let me regale you with tales…

Read MoreObservations from the Great Canadian Freeze: A Mugwump’s Satirical Take on Social Woes
  • Crystal Keyamo
  • February 23, 2025
  • Satire

Mysterious Ship Washed Ashore in the Maritimes: The Secrets of the Golden Age of Piracy to be Revealed?

Once upon a time, the world felt much larger than it is today. Seas stretched as far as the eye could see, adventure sailed with the tide and life was what you made of it. It was a time rife…

Read MoreMysterious Ship Washed Ashore in the Maritimes: The Secrets of the Golden Age of Piracy to be Revealed?
  • Connor Fraser
  • March 1, 2024
white text "NEW ROUNDABOUT" over image of new roundabout in Fredericton
  • Satire

SATIRE: Fredericton’s Answer to the Leaning Tower of Pisa

In the charming city of Fredericton, where traffic sometimes feels like a slow-motion ballet, a revolutionary roundabout has emerged as the latest local attraction. Move over, Leaning Tower of Pisa – there’s a new architectural sensation in town! Meet the…

Read MoreSATIRE: Fredericton’s Answer to the Leaning Tower of Pisa
  • Crystal Keyamo
  • December 29, 2023
white text on green background "SNACKTIVISTS REBELLION" above many arms raised holding signs with pictures of food on them and bullhorns.
  • Satire

Snacktivists’ Black Market Bites Off More Than They Can Chew

In a shocking turn of events, the Snacktivist rebellion on the University of New Brunswick campus came to an abrupt end yesterday as the notorious underground food smuggling ring was busted by university authorities. The Snacktivists, a group of daring…

Read MoreSnacktivists’ Black Market Bites Off More Than They Can Chew
  • Crystal Keyamo
  • November 3, 2023
  • CultureSatire

SATIRE: The Last Great Canadian Dynasty: The Scandal Behind UNB’s History Society

A word from Tilley Hall suggests that Keenan has a twin brother; nothing outrageous… if his twin brother were not a cat named Gomez.
Read MoreSATIRE: The Last Great Canadian Dynasty: The Scandal Behind UNB’s History Society
  • Sophia Cohen
  • February 7, 2023
  • Satire

SATIRE: Where There’s Smoke, There’s Fire: UNB Remembers Fredericton Heritage

This year UNB has chosen to honour a lesser-known part of Fredericton’s past—FIRE!
Read MoreSATIRE: Where There’s Smoke, There’s Fire: UNB Remembers Fredericton Heritage
  • Aidan Keenan
  • January 18, 2023
  • Satire

SATIRE: Musk’s Acquisition of UNB

In another dubious financial decision, South African billionaire Elon Musk has announced his acquisition of the University of New Brunswick.
Read MoreSATIRE: Musk’s Acquisition of UNB
  • Anonymous
  • December 12, 2022
  • Satire

Uh Oh! I’ve Been Possessed by a Girl Who’s in an MLM! And Boy Do I Have the Opportunity for You! Click Here Now!

Hey boss babes! It looks like I have been possessed by that girl you went to high school with that keeps trying to get you to join a pyramid scheme! OOPS! And I’m here to tell you about a golden…

Read MoreUh Oh! I’ve Been Possessed by a Girl Who’s in an MLM! And Boy Do I Have the Opportunity for You! Click Here Now!
  • The Brunswickan
  • April 18, 2022
  • Satire

Why the Harriet Irving Needs a Library Cat

Ladies, gentlemen, and those beyond a binary, do I have a proposition for you– picture it: you’re sitting at the Harriet Irving Library, pouring your heart and soul into a final essay. Exams are creeping up on you, and the…

Read MoreWhy the Harriet Irving Needs a Library Cat
  • The Brunswickan
  • April 18, 2022
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