*Spoilers Ahead*

Do you have a movie that you could watch everyday for the rest of your life and never get tired of it? A film that makes you feel such a rainbow of emotions that anything, and everything else in your life feels dull in comparison? 

What about a character that is so iconic, so relatable, that if you had to choose between preserving your own legacy and preserving theirs, you would choose theirs everytime? 

For me, that movie is Shrek 2. 

Hear me out, what other movie features an interspecies love story, blackmail, assassins and very large baked goods, PLUS an absolutely legendary soundtrack? No other movie can balance the boundaries between action, romance and comedy as elegantly as the second installment of the Shrek series. 

I will DIE on this hill. 

Picture this: one day you are locked in a tower holding a weird handkerchief and dreaming of a prince and, before you know it, you are married to the ogre of your dreams, living in a super cute cottage-core swamp, and on your way to visit your parents who are literal royalty. If that isn’t the dream, I don’t know what is. 

However, your hunky green boy-toy is not feeling this trip to meet the parents. He is stressed, he acts out, and suddenly you are stuck in the middle of a weird montage set to the tune of “I Need Some Sleep” by Eels. Yikes. 

Now, thanks to a creepy old lady with a god-complex, your marriage is in shambles, your husband is missing and you are passed out in the middle of your parents entryway. The tension is palpable, and the audience is on the edge of their seats. 

How will Shrek and Donkey get back into the castle? How will Fiona know that the man claiming to be her husband is actually Prince Charming? (Who btw, looks like an animated version of the hockey player that Jennifer Garner was dating in 13 Going on 30, but that’s another story.) 

Most importantly, how did Dreamworks convince Dame Julie Andrews to voice a character in this movie? 

I know, this sounds intense. It is. But, have no fear, Shrek and Donkey are absolute UNITS and rise to the occasion. 

I want to be clear about something: this film is an emotional roller coaster and will make you feel things that you didn’t know you were capable of. You will experience despair, stress and loss like never before (please proceed to pour one out for Mongo), but it is all worth it. 

Anyway, the moral of this story is that you should probably watch Shrek 2.